I dream of having a cow. I have my doubts as to whether or not we actually have enough room for one but I continue to dream anyways. I stopped to introduce myself to this overwhelmingly large herd one evening and we chit chatted for a little while. First I asked them point blank, "Have you ever wanted anything so bad you could taste it?" They stared at me in disbelief and then started to back up a few steps.
I quickly realized I had been misunderstood and as I tried to find the right words to set their hooves at ease I had the strange sensation that I was being watched, in a menacing, stalker-ish sort of way and as I glanced to my left, I discovered I was being watched in a menacing, stalker-ish sort of way. Egad! I nervously chuckled and made what I thought was a compliment of sorts about the lovely set of bangs he was sporting but he wasn't falling for any of that. In fact, I don't believe he fluttered a single eyelash. "For the love of Pete", I cried, "I want milk, cheese, butter and cream!" Then I crossed my fingers as I held my hand behind my back and I told them all I was a vegetarian.
And she seemed to believe me. It's always nice to have at least someone, anyone, in your corner. Thinking that things were finally getting back on track, I asked, "So who wants to come home with me?" With the exception of the sound of chewing and tails swishing we were surrounded by the silence of our thoughts. Then I realized my faux pas. I had been far too hasty in my offer. "Wait!" I cried. "Whose got milk?"
Then I panned to my right and saw that black and white dude. Yep, the one wearing a goalie mask. And I realized there was nothing I could say to turn things around and I high tailed it back to the car.
Here's hoping that word doesn't spread around the farms in these parts about the crazy former city lady looking for a dairy cow. I could be in a lot of trouble.
~Happy Friday Friends!~